There's a Lesson in Here Somewhere... I Think it's "Don't Kill Your Girlfriend's Pet Unicorn"

Last night, I dreamt that I had a pet unicorn. And then Boyfriend killed it. When I woke up, I was still kind of mad. Boyfriend was like "what's wrong?"

Me: "I had a bad dream."

Boyfriend: "I'm sorry. What was it about?"

Me: "I had a pet unicorn... "

Boyfriend: "That doesn't sound bad at all. That actually sounds pretty awesome."

Me: "No, but you killed it."

Boyfriend: "I killed your unicorn?"

Me: "Yeah."

Boyfriend: "Why would I do that?"

Me: "I don't know. You tell me."

Boyfriend: "Allie, I can't tell you because I didn't actually do anything."

Me: "I'm confused."

Boyfriend: "Why?"

Me: "Because what you are saying is logical, but I'm still totally pissed at you for killing my unicorn."

Boyfriend: "But I didn't kill your unicorn. Unicorns don't even exist."

Me: "I know that... It's just - it wasn't even doing anything and you walked up to it and bashed its head in with a rock."

Boyfriend: "That is actually kind of disturbing..."

Me: "I know! That's why I'm mad at you."

Boyfriend: "Wait... you're actually upset about this?"

Me: "Of course I'm upset! You murdered my pet unicorn!"

Boyfriend: "But remember how I didn't actually do that and it was just a dream?"

Me: "Yeah, but I loved Phineus."

Boyfriend: "Now it has a name?"

Me: "It always had a name! Did you think I was going to just not name my unicorn? How would I get its attention?"

Boyfriend: "I don't know... clapping?"

Me: "That would never work. What if we went to a concert or something... he would be so confused!"

Boyfriend: "Okay, what about - you know what? I'm not going to discuss this with you. This is ridiculous."

Me: "Whistling might work... it might learn to recognize my whistle..."

Boyfriend: "I'm going to go make lunch."

Me: "But what am I supposed to do? I'm still mad and I have no outlet."

Boyfriend: "I don't know - draw a picture to express your feelings. That usually seems to help."

Me: "Okay."